Hillary Clinton died and, Lord knows why, went to heaven. St. Peter approached her and says “Hillary, I know you’re ’somebody’ down on Earth, but up here, you’re just another person. And, I’m swamped right now, so have a seat and I’ll get back with you as soon as I can.”
So Hillary sits down and [...]

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Tired of his low approval ratings, President Clinton called up the head of the CIA and said, “I want your very best agent over here first thing in the morning.”
Moments later, a call went out to the Middle East, and the most gifted American agent was headed back to Washington.

The next morning, the agent was [...]

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Reporter: Governor Clinton, what damage do you think has been done to your campaign by your wife’s comment the other day about how “Hitler was really a great guy”?
Clinton: (Mixture of sadness and anger, but articulate as always.) Hillary and myself are shocked, outraged, and deeply saddened by this terrible misunderstanding. The media hype is [...]

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Al Gore and the Clintons are flying on Air Force One.

Bill looks at Al, chuckles and says, “You know, I could throw a $10,000 bill out the window right now and make one person very happy.”
Al shrugs his stiff shoulders and says, “Well, I could throw ten $1,000 bills out the window and make 10 [...]

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Clinton is on the beach at Martha’s Vinyard and finds that an old bottle has washed ashore. When the Prez opens it a very wan Genie snakes out.
Genie: Hi Bill. I’m a very weak genie, so I can only grant you one wish–it had better be easy if you want me to do it.
Clinton: I [...]

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Bill Clinton, George Bush, a spectacular looking blonde woman and an enormously large woman with an unfriendly scowl are in a train car. The train passes through a tunnel, and in the darkness the unmistakable sound of a slap is heard. As the train pulls out of the tunnel, the daylight reveals a big red [...]

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Q: What’s the difference between Monica Lewinsky and the rest of us?
A: In order for us to get some dick in the White House, we had to go out and vote.
Q: How will history remember Bill Clinton?
A: The President after Bush.
Q: What’s the difference between Bill Clinton and his dog Buddy?
A: One tries to hump [...]

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